Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
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