Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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