P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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