dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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