Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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