:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
