best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize