Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
