so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Randomize