i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Randomize
