ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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