i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
