you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
