you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
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