Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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