i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
