So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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