it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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