White coat. Heels.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
