i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Randomize
