Sponge bath it is.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
