There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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