Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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