Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
