8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
