i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize