i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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