"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
