Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize