This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
She told me I should be a condom model.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I know her cup size but not her name....
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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