Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Randomize
