i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
i black out too much to be "responsible"
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
