I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
