Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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