I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I just googled if crying burns calories
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize