I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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