That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
