Define "chronic" masturbator.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize
