you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Randomize
