I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
