that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
