3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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