Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
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