Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
operation harelip BJ is a go
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize