3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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