Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
pop tarts are not kleenex
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
