its not stalking. its research.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
