I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
