she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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