The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
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