Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
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